


you are my every poem

by crossbelladonna



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff, M/M, pinning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-03
Updated: 2015-10-03
Packaged: 2018-04-24 14:18:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4922842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crossbelladonna/pseuds/crossbelladonna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>You’re in love with him, and he’s in love with you, and it’s like a goddamn tragedy, because you look at him and see the stars, and he looks at you and sees the sun. And you both think the other is just looking at the ground.</i>
</p><p> </p><p>“<i>Iwa-chan,</i>” he complains.<br/>Oikawa’s too good for him.<br/>Iwaizumi looks away, disposing the tissues. <i>He’s bright, and dashing and beautiful and—</i><br/>He cups Oikawa’s face in his hands. <i>—might not like me that way.</i><br/>“It’s not your fault.” Iwaizumi tells him once more and Oikawa curls his hands around Iwaizumi’s jacket. They have this at least.</p>
            </blockquote>





	you are my every poem

**Author's Note:**

> it's a few hours before my birthday happy birthday to me u awful sinner
> 
> thanks to kira (@simple-symphonia) for beta-ing hhehebhehe

_You’re in love with him, and he’s in love with you, and it’s like a goddamn tragedy, because you look at him and see the stars, and he looks at you and sees the sun. And you both think the other is just looking at the ground…_

_***_

It’s that one time after his knee finally buckles under him after hours of grueling, relentless practice and Iwaizumi is yelling at him albeit his touch is gentle and soft and panicky as he helps Oikawa—already panting from the pain—on a bench, asking him in frustrated anger why he’s doing this to himself and Oikawa looks at him, sees the desperation in Iwaizumi’s face and all those beautiful creases of worry lined on his face and remembers thinking _he’s everything._

And then the terrified internalization that follows:

_Am I disgusting? If I want to touch his face and pull him close and hold him in a way that’s definitely not in friendship._

Then: _He must not know._

Iwaizumi walks ahead of him most of the time, always with a somehow protective stance that has become a part of him, just the way they like it. Oikawa wants nothing else but reach out to him, with more than just a hug, more than just a casual touch, more than just feeling delighted with his every smile and all he wonders is if he’ll allow it.

“What’s wrong?” Iwaizumi asks him, eyebrows quirking up.

Oikawa smiles and leans all over Iwaizumi’s back, just the way they always do.

“Nothing.” He whispers.

 

\---

 

Oikawa worries him a lot. Oikawa who gets nightmares when he’s stressed. Who treats his knee as some toy he can overuse to the point of breaking. Worries Iwaizumi even more when he can’t do anything to soothe his pain.

“Oikawa,” Iwaizumi whispers to him, kneeling in front of where Oikawa’s leaning against the side of his bed, sniffling into his hands.

Iwaizumi doesn’t know what to do. He’s cried his tears dry after losing but now that’s all gone and over, Oikawa’s crying and he doesn’t know where to put his hands to give him comfort. So in resolve, he pulls Oikawa against him, embracing him tight but gentle and lets him sob on his shoulder.

“It’s okay,” Iwaizumi assures him, letting Oikawa return the embrace as he rubs his back.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa sniffs. “I’m sorry.”

Iwaizumi grits his teeth in frustration. Often, Oikawa’s public smiles are superficial; either to be polite, to please, to piss people off generally and scare them off even but also—

To hide hurt.

Iwaizumi knows it all. Knows every quirk of Oikawa’s moods and knows how to deal with them. But this time…

“It’s not your fault,” Iwaizumi murmurs into Oikawa’s hair with the same intensity of feeling in his embrace.

“I didn’t catch it,” Oikawa’s voice breaks.

Iwaizumi exhales slowly. He pulls away from Oikawa gently to look at him. Oikawa blinks at him, confused, eyes still watering and red, nose pink and dripping and he’s pouting sadly. Strands of his hair are sticking on his forehead and Iwaizumi wipes them away with his hand. He reaches for his bag behind him and pulls out a few tissues to wipe Oikawa’s tears and snot.

“Is this worth looking ugly for?” Iwaizumi tells him lightheartedly and Oikawa’s pout worsens, his nose crinkling, affronted.

“ _Iwa-chan,_ ” he complains.

 _Oikawa’s too good for him_.

Iwaizumi looks away, disposing the tissues. _He’s bright, and dashing and beautiful and—_

He cups Oikawa’s face in his hands. _—might not like me that way._

“It’s not your fault.” Iwaizumi tells him once more and Oikawa curls his hands around Iwaizumi’s jacket. They have this at least.

 

\---

 

“Iwaizumi. _Iwaizumi…_ ”

Iwaizumi breaks his gaze away from Oikawa who’s humoring a few of his fangirls nearby, abruptly. He looks back to Hanamaki, raising his eyebrows.

“Huh?”

Hanamaki’s smirk is either teasing or very knowing. Beside him, Matsukawa’s watching the exchange with little interest, tapping his fingers on Hanamaki’s thigh.

“As I was saying…” Hanamaki continues and Iwaizumi’s attention drifts again when he hears Oikawa’s tinkling laughter, sounding a little too convincing to have the girls laughing along.

_Has he even eaten lunch yet? He’s annoying. How is he not tired of socializing yet? He’s such a brat sometimes—_

“ _Iwaizumi._ ”

Iwaizumi almost jumps and he whips his head to Hanamaki again, trying to be nonchalant.

“What? Yes.”

Matsukawa grins. “Hiro was just telling you in great detail about his very explicit life.”

Iwaizumi wrinkles his nose.

“Gross.”

Hanamaki sneers. “Not actually. You’re just not listening.”

Iwaizumi tries not letting his sheepishness show but it probably does anyway by the way the two assholes grin.

“Got distracted, sorry.” Iwaizumi says.

“Ah, distracted. Of course, wandering mind,” Matsukawa flutters his fingers suspiciously towards Oikawa’s direction.

Hanamaki leans closer to Iwaizumi and then follows his previous line of sight only to spot Oikawa standing some few feet away surrounded by a gaggle of girls. Hanamaki gives Iwaizumi a look.

“Ah,” he says.

“I-I was just wondering if he’s eaten lunch!” Iwaizumi stammers immediately.

Matsukawa and Hanamaki nod in such false seriousness that Iwaizumi wants to smack them both.

“Absolutely understandable,” Matsukawa says.

“Understandable,” Hanamaki echoes, nodding.

“Can’t help but be worried after a giant five year old after all.”

“I mean I’d be worried too, wouldn’t you Hiro?”

“No.”

“Same.”

“I hate you both.”

The two of them snicker and Iwaizumi can’t help hide his face in his hands in embarrassment.

“Oh, Iwaizumi, you’re so…” Hanamaki draws a heart in the air and Matsukawa helpfully blows it towards where Oikawa is. The three of them turn to look and meets Oikawa’s eyes. He waves enthusiastically at Iwaizumi. Matsukawa and Hanamaki turn their godawful smiles to Iwaizumi again.

Iwaizumi looks away, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Shut up.”

 

\---

 

Their very last day of practice has Oikawa so exhausted that he’s already drifting in and out of consciousness as he’s walking home with Iwaizumi. Balance fading now and again, he nearly crashes into Iwaizumi more than once after drifting off for a second longer than needed.

Iwaizumi immediately looks up at him in alarm.

“Ow, sorry, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa mumbles, stops walking and rubs at his eyes.

Iwaizumi looks at him in scrutiny.

“Oikawa,”

Oikawa answers with a little yawn and he waves a hand off flippantly.

“It’s fine, we’re almost home anyway,” he takes a step forward and nearly trips over his feet and Iwaizumi clutches onto him immediately. “Oops! I’m fine—I’m—” Yawn. “— _fine_. Just tired.”

“You know what? Let me carry you.” Iwaizumi offers.

Oikawa’s eyes widen in surprise and for a moment it seems his drowsiness is forgotten. Until he yawns again.

“Wha—Iwa-chan, no need…”

Iwaizumi scoffs. “What Oikawa, you ask me to carry you all the time and now you’re being a baby about this?”

Oikawa laughs softly, sleepily. “Iwa-chan.”

Iwaizumi turns around, offering his back. “Come on, Shittykawa, don’t waste time.”

Oikawa laughs breathily again before obliging, wrapping his arms around Iwaizumi’s neck as Iwaizumi lifts him up with familiar ease.

Oikawa buries his face against Iwaizumi’s hair, smelling the familiar cinnamon and watermelon scent of him, like home.

“My hero.” Oikawa mumbles sleepily.

Iwaizumi chuckles. “Sure.”

 

\---

 

Oikawa has fallen asleep by the time Iwaizumi arrives at Oikawa’s house and doesn’t bother waking him up as he walks up to the porch. Oikawa’s mother seems pleasantly surprised to see them at least.

“Oh my, Hajime-kun. Is that Tooru? Is he…?” she gushes softly.

Iwaizumi smiles and in a quiet voice answers, “It’s him alright. He’s very tired from practice. Can I…?”

Oikawa’s mother giggles and steps aside to let Iwaizumi in.

“Of course, the usual then,” she says.

Iwaizumi steps inside after removing his shoes and sets off to Oikawa’s room after putting his bag down.

“Ah, Hajime-kun,” Oikawa’s mother calls out once more and Iwaizumi turns back to her the slightest to find her smiling. “Thank you for Tooru.”

Iwaizumi waves a hand, keeping a smile to himself.

 

Oikawa murmurs complaints when Iwaizumi sets him down the bed but doesn’t wake up, laying on his back and still very asleep. Iwaizumi leans down towards him and smoothes Oikawa’s bangs back.

“Oikawa,” he whispers. “I’m going to remove your jacket okay?” he tugs at the hems of Oikawa’s jacket and successfully manages to remove one arm off when Oikawa murmurs again and turns on his side, hugging Iwaizumi’s arm.

Iwaizumi sighs. “ _Oikawa_. Let go,” he tries pulling his arm away and Oikawa only whines.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa mumbles, face scrunching into a grimace and Iwaizumi has to purse his lips to stop his laughter. He leans in close to Oikawa’s ear.

“It’s me, it’s me now let go of me, come on Oikawa,”

“ _No_ …”

Iwaizumi definitely snorts this time. He tries yanking his arm out of Oikawa’s grip but Oikawa holds on tighter so with another sigh, he maneuvers himself with one hand to get Oikawa out of his jacket.

Oikawa’s hold slackens when he does so Iwaizumi quickly takes his arm away and replaces Oikawa’s embrace with a pillow. Oikawa grumbles into the pillow momentarily before going back to sleep.

Iwaizumi smiles, smoothing Oikawa’s hair again.

_How easy it would be to kiss him goodnight._

He steps away before he could manage it.

 

\---

 

Oikawa wakes up to the afternoon sun glaring on his face that he blinks lazily, feeling all hot and sweaty and generally uncomfortable and he finds out why when he sits up to see that he hasn’t changed out of his clothes from last night.

_Last night._

Oikawa sits up straighter. Last night Iwaizumi carried him home and… _oh_ he probably…

“I fell asleep,” Oikawa groans, putting his face in his hands. It happens all the time and really, he owes Iwaizumi a lot for that alone.

Oikawa doesn’t botherchecking the time when he gets up, going off to shower and pausing when he sees his jacket neatly folded on his desk and for some infuriating reason, this makes Oikawa’s cheeks burns that he runs for the bathroom.

It’s a little late afterwards when he finally takes notice of the small note tucked beneath his folded jacket, written almost hesitantly.

 

_Oikawa,_

_I wasn’t able to tell you last night about some news because you were tired but well_

_~~I want to say~~ _

_~~I just want you to know~~ _

_~~I got an acceptance letter from the same un~~ _

_I might be seeing you again and again for the next four years._

_Love, Iwa_

And from Oikawa’s room for the next few seconds comes a shrill screeching that startles his parents in the living room.

When Oikawa comes down though, he’s composed his face enough that he looks dazed, clutching a pillow against him and Iwaizumi’s letter in his hand.

Oikawa’s parents glance at each other swiftly and then to their son now seated on the sofa, staring at the wall.

Oikawa’s mother chuckles. “Good afternoon, sweetheart.”

Oikawa runs his hands at the back of the paper, feeling the dents Iwaizumi’s penmanship made, where he hesitated, where he was figuring out what to say, where he left his love.

A smile makes its way to Oikawa’s face.

“Iwa-chan’s going to the same university as me,” he says, all sorts of emotions ready to burst in his chest. _Love, Iwa. Love._ Love.

“Ah yeah, his dad made a mention of it—”

Definitely grinning now.

“He’s not leaving me.”

“When has he ever—”

Oikawa stands up abruptly, laughing in glee. He drops everything but Iwaizumi’s letter and sprints out the door yelling, “I’M GOING OUT!”

“Hold on—Tooru!”

 

Oikawa runs, breathing heavily, knowing full well where Iwaizumi spends his afternoons during the weekends and just hoping he’s right there _now_ he has to see him—

Oikawa nearly trips over his feet when he spies Iwaizumi at one of the swings in the currently empty park, unraveling the leash of his shiba inu tangled around his hand, a little frown on his face and Oikawa’s heart feels as though it’s going on in a race.

_Love, Iwa._

His breath hitches as he steps forward again. Iwaizumi catches the movement immediately, turning his head and sees it’s just Oikawa before relaxing. He stands to say hello and Oikawa’s not sure if he’s still in control of his body as he’s running, running to Iwaizumi and crashing into him with a tight hug that leaves Iwaizumi momentarily breathless.

“Oikawa—” Iwaizumi huffs, returning the embrace anyway.

To Oikawa’s horror, his own eyes start tearing up and he bursts into tears eventually much to Iwaizumi’s alarm.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa mumbles against Iwaizumi’s neck, still holding him close.

Iwaizumi pats Oikawa’s back, confused and a little distressed.

“Hey, what’s wrong? What’s going—”

“I love you,” Oikawa says, cutting Iwaizumi off entirely. “ _I love you._ Iwa-chan, I love you, I—” Oikawa sniffs.

“Tooru,” Iwaizumi chokes out, throat suddenly closing up and his heart gradually going haywire.

“I’m sorry I make you carry me all the time, I love you. I love you—”

Iwaizumi pulls away just the slightest so he can see Oikawa’s face as he whispers his love and Iwaizumi watches as Oikawa knits his eyebrows together, trying to keep his face from going into a pout and it makes Iwaizumi chuckle. He reaches out a hand to smooth the wrinkle away.

“Don’t hate me,” Oikawa says.

Now Iwaizumi is the one trying to compose his expression, he exhales slowly.

“Why would I ever do that?”

“Because I lo—”

“Because you love me,” Iwaizumi finishes. “And I love you how could I hate you?”

Oikawa’s jaw slackens. “Ah but—”

Iwaizumi scoffs. “Shut up.”

And he’s pulling Oikawa back to him but this time their lips meet and Oikawa thinks _love_ , Iwaizumi is warm and real here as he’s holding on to him, lips soft despite the brash words that come out of it when Oikawa hurts himself and he thinks again _love_ when Iwaizumi doesn’t intend to let  him go.

However they do break away when they hear insistent barking and they both laugh softly against each other’s cheeks as Iwaizumi’s dog paws at Oikawa’s shoes.

“Reminds me of you sometimes,” Iwaizumi comments and Oikawa huffs indignantly.

“ _Excuse me,_ Iwa-chan.”

“Hmm,” Iwaizumi says, intertwining their fingers together.

“Did you compare me to a dog? _Like Mad Dog-Chan?_ ”

“I was thinking you’re more like a crab but—”

“ _Iwa-chan_.”

Iwaizumi chuckles. _Love._ It’s going to be alright.

***

 

_…but god just notice you’re both looking at the sky ([x](http://lostcap.tumblr.com/post/80840812807/youre-in-love-with-him-and-hes-in-love-with))._

**Author's Note:**

> fluff and pinning makes the world go round
> 
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/crossbelladonna) | [tumblr](http://crossbelladonna.tumblr.com/)


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